Ten Truths

1. I hate forwards. Email, texting, blogging..but I do it because I love Ivy :)

2. When Ed and I were dating in high school he played a ridiculous game, Everquest. We almost broke up over it a dozen plus times because he'd get lost in it, not realize the time, and never pick me up for dinner. Sigh. Now, I have a character..her name is Tadia :) We're nerdly. I know it. Neither of us are really big TV fans, and it fills the void that school work, wedding planning, and applications have left in my world.

3. I feel like a giant fraud, and am afraid of being found out when (if) I get in to grad school and have to do some genuine work. Mmm..it's not the work that scares me, because I know I can work my ass off, it's the on-the-spot questions that make me feel nauseous.

4. I've never been close to any of my extended relatives. I've asked my parents why we weren't closer to aunts/uncles/cousins/grandparents, and their reply is just that they didn't care to be. I resent them for that. And am envious of people who have large families that they can't wait to see. Ed's grandparents live right down the street from my parents, and they're always having everybody over. I'm closer to ALL of his relatives than I've EVER been to any of mine, and I'm so, so grateful for that.

5. Ed is my world. We grew in to who we are, together. He challenges me. He will do anything to make me feel beautiful. When I started college all I wanted was my bachelors..mostly because all I was ever made to feel like I deserved was my "M.R.S." degree. When I told my parents I wanted to go to grad school, they laughed. Ed jumped in the air with excitement. Same response when I told them each about my interview. Ed never even mentioned that he hadn't heard from a school yet, just yelled, "We're going to New York!" He is my support system. He kisses me on the cheek and makes sure I'm nice and snuggly before he leaves for work every morning. He'd dance with me anywhere, and even though he HATES to snuggle, he'd do it for hours just to make me smile. On our last day in Rome, he went and bought tons of cheeses and wine while I was taking a shower because he knew that was the one thing we didn't do there that I really wanted to. He tickles me all the time, just because he loves the sound of my oh-my-gosh-I-can't-breathe laugh.

6. I don't fall asleep in public places. I just can't do it. Can't fall asleep if the TV or a movie is on, even if I've seen it a hundred times. The ONLY time I have ever been relaxed enough to fall asleep was on the beach in Kailua, Hawaii. When I get stressed out, I imagine myself laying on the beach, warm sand, cool breeze, waves crashing. I love Hawaii because Ed proposed there, but even more so because it was the place where I felt the most relaxed in my life.

7. I really wish I had my long, curly hair again and am terrified that it might never be that pretty again.

8. I would absolutely love to go out of state for grad school...and even though my family and friends are in Texas, will be slightly disappointed if we end up staying.

9. I hate my job. Loathe. Had a dream this morning that I quit, and cried a little when my alarm went off and I realized it wasn't real. Stupid thing is, if we stayed in Austin I'd feel like I had to keep the job too. I can't say no to people and it drives me fucking nuts.

10. I'm really trying to stop cursing..but can't find a good reason to.